Mako Chats from Last Night #3 - AITA edition
CSL-CSP_JOs de SPG_COMMO, I (27, M, 1120) am standing my EOOW proficiency back aft and I’m here to answer an age-old submarine question – Am I the Asshole? I didn’t pay attention during the pre-watch brief, so I’m not sure how long we’re supposed to be at PD but I’ll answer your questions while I can…k/BBM
SPG COMMO de PBL_AOPS… My XO (35, M, 1120) turned over a couple of months ago and he came from PERS-42 as the Department Head Detailer. I (26, M, 1120) have been engaged in a months-long flattery campaign to boost my odds of getting detailed to a sick job in DC, and successfully accomplished my mission. I even went as far as making up a fake fiancée that “I still need to convince her for me to stay in… maybe getting a shore tour in DC near her family would go a long way…” However, my best friend (26, F, 1120) in my wardroom who gave her last shit 12 months ago got orders to Guam. I heard the XO tell our WEPS (31, M, 1120) that “She said she’s getting out after shore tour anyways, she’ll figure it out in Guam). AITA? …k/GGH
PBL_AOPS de SPG_ COMMO, No, YNTA. But your shamelessness inspires me. It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. Your friend could have spent her time complimenting your XO’s pen, being “really interested” in his bespoke coffee brewing equipment, or engaging in conversations with him about the Taiwan Strait. You played the game masterfully and won, no shame in that…k/BBM
SPG_COMMO de SOC_DCA, the EOOW (24, F, 1170) that I (25, M, 1170) relieve is mad at me because I don’t relieve the watch until 1530. I told her the plan of the day has watch reliefs for 0730, 1530, and 2330 and that I am simply executing the plan the XO signed out. Additionally, if we all relieve at the bottom of the hour IAW the POD, then nobody ends up getting screwed. AITA? …k/TMS
SOC_DCA de SPG_COMMO, Yes, YATA. As the great Albert Einstein proved, time is relative. Ten minutes at the end of a watch equates to approximately 45 minutes at the start of a watch. By my calculations, your lackadaisical attitude of relieving the watch at the bottom of the hour generates an additional 1.75 Man-hours of additional watchstanding for EOOWs that could be better spent un-NUBing yourself. Also consider this: you could delaying the starting of the off-going watch section’s show. Throughout the underway, these late start times could compound into a significant degradation in the off going watch section’s ability to burn through the seasons of whatever shitty show they’re watching. Also have you considered that your Electrical Operator smells like toe cheese? …k/BBM
SPG_COMMO de RIC_AWEPS, I (27, F 1120) have not done the Battery Binder audit that our EA (23, M, 1170) put in my inbox three weeks ago. I keep forgetting to do it until I’m already in the rack about to get my 10 hours down before my next watch and decide I’ll do it in my next off-going. He sent me an email about it the day he dropped it in my inbox but didn’t give me a due date, nor has he followed up about it. I was looking at the plan of the week in outlook to see when I should schedule my medical appointments to avoid supporting trainers in shore and saw that he has an Audit and Surveillance review with the CO next week. AITA? … k/ASB
RIC_AWEPS de SPG_COMMO No, YNTA. The best tool to learn on a submarine is to experience trauma. As you remember from your time back aft, a good ass chewing from the Skipper about the sad state of his Audit and Surveillance program will send the EA, tail between his legs, to your stateroom to ask if you’ve done his audit yet. You will be able to teach him the important lessons of face-to-face communications, setting deadlines for tasks given out, and being assertive. Additionally, you can take credit for this mentoring the next generation of RIC junior officers as a fitrep bullet point. Also, Electrical Division audit and surveillance is made up and the points don’t matter…k/BBM
SPG_COMMO de NYC_ASWO, I (26, F) recently got my friend (25, M) accidentally removed from watch as contact manager due to a true disaster of an OBT scenario that I ran on his watch last week. He’s super pissed and says it’s all my fault. I don’t think it’s my fault that he ignored 6 signs of a very close contact and took 4 CPAs <500 yards with 4 different contacts. AITA? …k/TVB
NYC_ASWO yes, YATA. Any senior JO who becomes the OBT puppet master behind the scenes of OBT that’s not an asshole knows that your primary job is to make the JO on watch look good. It doesn’t have to be too obvious. Try giving hints on upcoming contact zigs, eg: “I have to use the head, but I need to wait 10 minutes to see what happens”. You could also try probing questions, eg: “So why exactly do you think you’re opening M-1”. If all else fails you could treat it like proctoring the setpoints question of the BEQ exam, eg: “Hmm.. what if you added 110 to their course and 5 kts to their speed and divided their range by two, what would that contact solution look like?” Hope this helps! …k/BBM
SPG_COMMO de SPG_XO, find yourself a relief and report to my stateroom
*SPG_COMMO disconnected from the server*