A SUBPAR Thanksgiving

Three Thanksgivings ago the USS [REDACTED] was moored to Romeo Pier at Naval Base Guam. It had been welded there for [REDACTED] days after the fast and slow speed windings for the [REDACTED] caught on fire and fused together for an unknown reason that may or may not have been the [REDACTED]’s fault. The world of our COVID port-call was limited to roughly 1000 square feet of concrete pier, a shore power bunker and large lookout towers used primarily for drinking.  

Nevertheless, it was one of our most memorable Thanksgivings. Armed with an unlimited supply of light beer (shoutout MWR), a CHOP who didn’t totally suck at his job*, and a CO who opted for leisure instead of the training required by the [REDACTED] team in their recent report. We ate, we drank, we watched movies, played board games, and forgot we weren’t allowed to leave the pier. 

This Thanksgiving we are thankful that we don’t have to spend it pier side on a submarine. 

But, we are just as thankful that in 2020 we did. 

Photo Credit: CSS3(SS) [REDACTED]
Note: Not pictured here is WEPS. He was topside drinking his “3rd” beer of the day. 

We hope that your Thanksgiving is just as memorable and procedurally compliant. 

V/r, 

The Subpar Group

*Fuck you CHOP. Even if you didn’t suck.